Dear my Closest Friend
by FrozenBrokenSunflower
Summary: Takes place after the Sino-Soviet split, Songfic, Dear My Closest Friend by Flyleaf. China's missing Russia, so he writes him a letter. "Dear my closest friend, I'm writing because, I miss you so much."
1. Dear my Closest Friend

Dear My Closest Friend

I always wanted to do a songfic before. But it really wasn't in mind, as I was just listening to music as I did homework, but then as I listened to the lyrics to this beautiful song, I actually thought of China.

This song possibly could work with Russia, but I wanted to try doing something in China's point of view. Also, this takes place after the Sino - Soviet Split 1991, some references based off of a MAD. Also, the lyrics are in italics, along with the letters.

Dear My Closest Friend - Flyleaf

If you would like, look up the song before you read the fic, it would probably set the mood.

* * *

><p><em>Dear my closest friend,<em>

_I'm writing because, I miss you so much. At night I always cry, the stillness still reminds me of when we first fell in love, and I miss that so much. _

_Dear my closest friend._

I sat comfortably in a well cushioned chair, it was my favorite, warm and soft. Ivan gave it to me, as a birthday gift.

I treasure it so much now.

Along with all the other gifts he gave me, because now, they're all I have that's close to him. Not that any item could replace him. I wanted to be a strong independent country, but I regret so much leaving him. I laid my head back in the soft cushion, that smelled heavily of Vodka.

For that chair, was the seat he would always sit in when he came over. He used to come over a lot, when we would just sit, and idly chat until there was nothing left to say. Then the both of us would sit in silence, soaking up each other's presence. The other's presence filling the cracks that were made when both of us were alone, for him, almost his whole life, and for me, after my family grew up and left.

I honestly do miss those times, I never realized how lonely I really was until we split. So here I am, sitting in his chair, on a still summer night, with regrets heavy on my mind. Making it impossible for me to think about anything else.

Many times, do I recall, when the feeling was too much, and I ended up crying myself to sleep. I bite my lip in a vain attempt to stop the tears, _you don't know what you do to me, Ivan Braginski. _

God, I miss him so much, it's tearing me apart. I'm 4,000 years old, not some love drunk school girl, but I just can't control this.

_Dear my closest friend,_

_I remember when, you asked me to stay, and I just walked away. I apologize, I hope my letters sent. _

_I lost that moment. I lost that moment._

I don't have the guts to see him again. Maybe I'm afraid to see that he's fine without me. Yes, that's it. I'm afraid to see that he's fine without me, but I'm falling apart without him. But who would he have...? Didn't the Soviet Union break down as well?

It's all my fault, if I wasn't such a prideful prude, I would still be with him. But no. I had to walk away, be the strong country I'm 'expected' to be. Did I expect this relationship to be perfect? No.

Nothing is perfect, but it sure felt like it was, for a while at least. Perfect, what a silly word. Nothing is ever perfect, everyone will always find flaws. But it felt close, close to perfect. I want that feeling again.

Maybe I should write him a letter, I remember when we had to do that. When he couldn't come over to visit, he would always send me a letter. In his big neat handwriting. I leave the comfort of the chair to go look for one of his old letters, despite how it might make me miss him more.

_Dearest Yao,_

_I'm at a big stuffy meeting in Moscow, and I couldn't visit. I hope you don't miss me too much though! I really want to be with you, and hug you, actually more than that. If you know what I mean...I miss you very much, da? I wish I could run my hands through your hair right now, and have some of your tea, and sit in that chair I gave you. Are you sitting in it right now?, as you read this? _

_I'll see you soon, Bolshevik. Ya lyubylu tebaya, _

_Love, Ivan_

I'm a bit sad now, because the tears have fallen on the letter, and ruined some of words. There's nothing I can do, so I'll just have to be careful with it from now on. Even though I have a bunch of others, everyone of them are special. They're like children, very important to you, even if you have many, you can't just let one die, or get sick.

I've decided to write him one, because I'm too much of a coward to tell him myself. I pick up a brush, and some paper. I still don't know what to write, back when I was with him, I could write letters back to him with ease.

But now I'm just so nervous. How do I even want to sound in this letter? I chew on the end of the brush, and run through my hands through my hair, as I collect my thoughts together. Then it hit me, I haven't wrote a letter in a long time. I may have lost my touch.

Should I start with my, dear, or dearest?

_Dear Ivan, _

Now what? What should I say? I'm lonely? I'm sorry? I miss you? I stare at what I wrote on the paper, and sigh. Am I really doing this? I can't stop doubting, and contradicting my thoughts. I closed my eyes, and rubbed my temples, I'm getting way too worked up over this letter, and I don't even have to send it.

_How are you doing? I know you must be a bit surprised to get a letter from me, especially at a time like this, but I just wanted to tell you a few things. _

_To start off, I'm sorry. I honestly didn't want to leave you, but at the time, I wasn't thinking about the future, how leaving you would affect me. I thoroughly regret it now, after sitting in our chair alone, and crying, reading our letters, and drinking Vodka until I was sick, I finally got sick and tired of feeling like this. In short, Ivan, I miss you, I want to be with you again, even if we are just friends._

_I still love you though._

I reread the letter. It was brief, but it was so true, that it almost scared me. I don't know what I would do if I was him, reading such a bizarre letter.

_Love, Yao _

Yes, it was night, but I couldn't wait to send it. I put on more decent clothes, and walked out heading for the post office, after I put it in an envelope, and wrote his address on it.

As soon as I sent it, I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep tonight. That letter and him, would be on my mind all night, that I couldn't possibly get sleep. I felt extremely relieved though, like a heavy burden was lifted off of me.

_Seconds at a time. Seconds at a time. _

_I wait for your answer, but I already know._

I tossed in turned in my silk covers. Will he reply? What will he think? What will happen after that? I sigh in defeat, only time will tell.

_Your hand was always mine._

_Your hand was always mine._

_Dear my Closest Friend,_

_I'm writing because, I miss you so much._

* * *

><p>Here's for a more lovey-dovey fic, since the death fic made me really sad. I'm still working on the last Chapter of Tribute to Vanya, so don't think I forgot. This just came to mind and I had to write it. Hehe. I think there is going to be another Chapter, just a response Chapter from Russia's view.<p>

Hope you enjoyed, review please!

Ya lyubylu tebaya - "I love you" In Russian, and of course, I only used Google Translate.

Also, I hope you guys will please listen to the song, it's beautiful.


	2. A Letter Back

Dear my Closest Friend, A Letter Back

Okay, so I'm pretty much writing another song fic, as a response to the first Chapter. I'm sorry, it's the same song...  
>I couldn't find anything more fitting, but it works with both of them! ^-^<br>The song, letters, and a bit of the past are portrayed in italics. Sorry if I confuse you guys.  
>Here's the ending! Hope you enjoy. (This'll be much happier, because the first one was a bit sad.)<p>

* * *

><p>A Letter Back<p>

_Dear my Closest Friend, _

_I'm writing because, I miss you so much, at night I always cry. The stillness still reminds me, of when we first fell in love, and I miss that so much._

_Dear my Closest Friend._

What's this? Mail for Ivan Braginski? From someone other than Belarus or his boss?

Impossible.

Who would want to write a letter to him? He was all alone, and had a notion that he was going to stay that way for a while, a long while.

Today, went against all odds, and logic. Summer had finally came, and it felt somewhat warm out. He didn't expect the warm weather to come for a few weeks, but just like he never expected a letter, he never expected this.

It was mild out, about 60 or 70 degrees, the sun shone fairly brightly, as he walked home. Clutching the letter in his hand. He must have looked like a loon, because he was grinning far wider than usual. It's not like he cared what other people thought anyways.

At the moment, all he could think about was the letter. The person who it was from, was very, very special to him. He also hasn't heard from this special someone for quite sometime.

Quite sometime.

After an unbearable period of him walking home, barely containing his excitement, he finally got home. And when he did, Ivan ran through the house grabbed a bottle of Vodka and sat down on his favorite spot on the couch.

His back was propped up against the arm of the worn, but comfy couch, he extended his legs across the length of it, and got the letter from out of his pocket.

Time to read the letter from Yao~Yao!

He paused and thought for a moment, and wondered what depressing things might be in it. Maybe he's still mad...? Ivan felt a wave of nervousness wash over him, what if it's not what he expected?

Since everything was going against odds today, maybe-

His trail of thought stopped, and he finally decided to open the damn thing. He viciously ripped the envelope open, because the only thing that mattered, was inside. To his dismay, there was another envelope inside.

This time, it was a rich red color, with intricate gold detail lining it. Now this, needed to be opened carefully. He slit a pale finger along the flap, the seal on it slowly coming apart, as he inched the finger gingerly across.

Almost...there!

The red envelope was finally open, and there was an actual letter inside. The letter was written with his small, yet beautiful, (and artsy), handwriting. He took a sip of vodka, then proceeded to read the letter.

_Dear Ivan,_

_How are you doing? I know you must be a bit surprised to get a letter from me, especially at a time like this, but I just wanted to tell you a few things._

_To start off, I'm sorry. I honestly didn't want to leave you, but at the time, I wasn't thinking about the future, how leaving you would affect me. I thoroughly regret it now, after sitting in our chair alone, and crying, reading our letters, and drinking Vodka until I was sick, I finally got sick and tired of feeling like this. In short, Ivan, I miss you, I want to be with you again, even if we are just friends._

_I still love you though._

_Love, Yao_

It wasn't a long letter, nor was it poetry, but it said everything that needed to be said. This simple letter fixed everything that needed to be fixed between them, it was what they both felt, but was too prideful, or too ashamed to say it.

Yao was a genius. How Ivan wished he was the one who sent it, being the one to fix the relationship. He actually never thought Yao was going to swallow his pride and be the first to break the ice, that has frozen between them.

_Dear my Closest Friend,_

_I remember when, you asked me to stay, and I just walked away. I apologize, I hope my letters sent._

_I lost that moment. I lost that moment._

He could remember the day they split, as clear as day, a memory so vivid, it felt like he was there, each time he thought of it.

"_Will you follow me, Little Bolshevik?"_

"_No, Ivan, I won't."  
><em>

A pang of sorrow, hit him, as he remembered what happened. It was one of the worst days of his life.

Possibly the worst out of all, now that he thought of it.

Ivan dreaded this feeling, this feeling of sorrow and emptiness. Knowing that it would all go away soon, all he needed to do, was write back.

Sure, he could call Yao, but this was much more romantic. Plus he missed writing letters. He set the letter down on the coffee table, and ran upstairs, on a search for the room that had a desk, which has a pen, and some paper.

"Where is it, where is it?" he said out loud, as he tried opening each door, looking in each room for a simple desk.

This was the downfall of having such a big house. You have no idea where anything is.

He opened about the 15th door or so.

"Finally!" he walked in, and lit a candle on the desk, he immediately found what he was looking for.

He sat down, and scribbled the pen until it finally wrote. Ivan was very good at writing letters, and collected all his thoughts beforehand.

_Dearest Yao,_

He smiled, as he planned how he would write his feelings, his heart, down on this paper.

_I'm doing much better now that you wrote me. I'm sorry to hear that you were feeling that way, but if it makes you feel any better, I've been going through similar things too. I'm not going to list them, because, we can talk about that, another time. Right now, I'm eager to see you again._

_It's a perfect time to go to the place we've longed for, a field where the sun shines, and golden sunflowers all around us. Do you remember?_

_It's summer now, I'm sure the sunflowers are growing in your place. Would you mind if I visited you?_

_Love, Ivan_

He smiled proudly, finishing the letter, and rereading it for errors. He was all excited to see him again, but he knew he would have to wait a bit.

_Seconds at a time, seconds at a time. _

I have waited years to be with you, I will wait even more, just to be with you again.

_I wait for your answer, but I already know._

See you soon, my Yao.

_Your hand was always mine._

_Your hand was always mine._

_Dear my Closest friend,_

_I'm writing because, I miss you so much._

* * *

><p>Ah, I hope that was as satisfying to read, as it was to write. I hate leaving things unfinished now. Especially a fic like that. After reading something sad, I want to read something happy.<p>

^-^ Sorry this took so long. Review please~!

(Death Fic ending coming up...If only Mungetsu was here...)


End file.
